Happy New Year

From every otologist, a happy new ear
From me Happy new year ..

First world poverty

sleeping on his torn pillow, the beggar felt down.. ;)

when an innocent guy gets convicted,its called "trial and error".


"hit and run" cases lead to "hit and trials " .

The only difference between "Wrestling for peace" and "Wrestling is that one ends in peace other in pieces.

He was enriched by his father's will power.

The woodcutter was fired by the firm and he is just an axed-employee now. (triple pun intended)

Lady Gaga's dresses often seem hep-hazard.

Footwear modelling is a shoe business.

Drink to Death

Ail = Ale
Bear = Beer
ShamePain = Champagne
Whine = Wine
WitchKey = Whiskey
BrainDie = Brandy

PJ (Pun Jokes)

1. Why wouldn't the american girl go out with a british man?

- because they had different "dating" conventions..

2. Why did the acid not indulge in the pleasures of chemical reaction to give out a new product?

- because it was "ascetic" acid.


3.Why was the lawyer angry when his name appeared in small letters ?
- because he was sensitive to "cases".


Author: Chetan

dear-dare

When you call your other half dear, is it because she is precious or because its expensive to sustain her.
Courtesy: WordWeb (Dear=Having a high price)

food for thought

An apple a day keeps the doctor away....why?
Because just an apple a day will cause starvation (which is not a disease ) and hence nothing left for the doctor to do.

The His Logic

1 Girl Many Boys: FOLLOWhER
1 Boy Many Girls: LEADhER
The winner HERo ,rest left in the HERd

country-puns

GALLway is in IREland
NETHERland is another name for HELLand

Footwear modelling is a shoe business.

Punsive...

Mirror is the best inter-face to reflect upon one's true self.

JOB PROFILE

Painter: colourful
Singer: enchanting
Logger: lumbering
Programmer: cut-copy-paste (only truth no pun)
Salesman: out-standing
Navy: fleeting
Driller :Boring
Banker: interesting
Doctor: organised

Politics pun-ished :-)

Politricks. It takes place in the parleyment where two factions  try to negotiate the country. One is the ruling party on one end of the see-saw and the other the opposition party and rest the audience. Like the see-saw,stability is unstable.It has two houses, one the house of the pee-pole( it really stinks) and the council of states(bad,worse,worst). Lok Sabha is headed by a speaker(misnomer because the opportunity of speaking is minimal).Rajya Sabha is headed by the chairman(which again is a misnomer because he hardly has the opportunity to be a man on the chair while controlling 250 sinister oh! minister).They all meet for cession of parliamentary duties thus establishing demoncracy.

with pun's presense felt..

1)20-20 is all about scores.

2)drinking spirit does lift ones spirit

3)Flash and Flush is all about faces :P 

4)Deep inside I feel that I am a shallow thinker.

Dont be attacking, be dePUNsive....

1)The aerialist knew how to keep up his performance.

2)On entering the interview ,he was dumb-struck to see the panel.During the interviewhe was tongue-tied.On hearing about his selection,his joy was tongueless.

3)STUDENTS LIFE

insert(books)->enter(school)->pgup->pgdown->break->esc(some do)->pgup->pgdn->end->home.Print scrn->ctrl+c ->ctrl+v (nextday). Some are F9 with it while some F8(F-ight) with it. But in the end none can alt or shift the ctrl of it.

4)The chinaman who worked as a bouncer, was bowled over by a maiden and he couldn't get over her.

5)the boxer was known for his punch lines

Pun-time

1.Working out works out only if u can work out the work out regime.


2.Yes, he did fought valiantly, but thats his-story.

3. Its tough maintain your position in this rat race world, because what matters is gnawledge.

4.In India, INDIgenous works.

5.If you want to standout in a group,you need to be thinking aHEAD.

funwithpun

Pun is a humorous play of words and here I am to head this headless thread.

[An earnest request : NO COPY PASTE ,ONLY ORIGINAL QUEST]

Here are  few of mines which I am to explode:

1)Beauty fools beautiful beauty-fools.

2)The poor man was broke while trying to make the ends meet

3)Due to his misdemeanour, the negro was blacklisted.

4)On hearing about his child feat,the amputator gave him a big hand.

5)The historian, during his Peruvian expedition, found artifacts that were incan-descent.

6)When a man marries a girl,its a miss-take.

7)He was busy buzzing off the bees.

8)During the recession, the chemist became irresolute and insolvent

9)Degrading is basically  D-grading.

10)Preparing for the 400 m hurdle race, the athlete was improving by leaps and bounds.

We will surely need a punchayat to decide the best one...So keep contributing punters..